The Beacon; My Siren - Chap 22

[wild_terrain]

Title: The Beacon; My Siren
Author: wild_terrain (ie. fi_chan)
Banner (Made beautifully by love_cassiopeia):

 

Chapter: [22 / ?]
Rating: MA15+
Genre: AU [FLANGST, mystery, spirituality, romance]
Summary: Philophobia… The fear of falling in love or being in love. I didn’t know such a thing existed until I met him… Kim JaeJoong was my age—a youthful 25 years—and the owner of a popular café, yet he was already known around town as the mysterious hermit who had chosen to completely withdraw from the world. How on earth could someone so young be afraid of loving others to the point of secluding themselves from all human beings? What was he afraid of? What was he hiding? I just didn’t understand it. And by that stage, the need to understand it was all I could think about... In fact, he was all I could think about…

Jung Yunho… For all of my life I had grown up away from the limelight. I couldn’t stand being noticed by anybody, and for a long time I thankfully never was. But then you came and suddenly you were everywhere – waving to me as I swept the café after closing, saying hello to me as you cycled past the bench I was sitting on, helping me carry my groceries inside whilst talking non-stop to me as if we were actually friends… Why are you always around making my heart thump erratically? Why do you even care? The more you try to explore this town, the more I need to step up and protect you from your own curiosity, because I know It is out there and I know It wants to harm you…

Trailer: CLICK TO WATCH~~

Beta =  moon1084 <3

A/N: I spy with my little eye, something that looks like...chapter 22. XD *fail*

 

“Nyahaha. I win, suckers! Feel the burn!”

“Shh, Yunho-yah,” Eunbi half laughed, half hissed as she turned around in her seat to examine all the train passengers I’d disturbed by my sudden triumphant yelling.

Eunbi and Junsu were seated in the two seats across the aisle from me, a stash of useless cards in their hands that were dumped with bitterness into the messy discard pile. We’d been using the little plastic fold-out food trays attached to the back of our fancy train chairs as our discard table, occasionally leaping sideways to pick up stray cards that flew off the trays and onto the aisle as the train bumped around.

To make the ride more dangerous and exciting, we’d all agreed to gamble on the card game—despite little kids’ ears in near proximity. The two losers had to pay for the winner’s lunch at the train’s buffet carriage.

Kekeke.

“How about best out of three?” Junsu suggested, trying to amp up the sound of innocence. He didn’t fool me.

“Not a chance. You can’t change the rules after the game’s been played. Today the happy couple are my lunch bitches. The card gods have spoken.” I sat back in my chair, stacking and bumped my cards against the fold-old tray in a confident rhythm.

"Settle down, you brat," Eunbi chuckled, rolling her eyes as I sent her a mischievous grin. "You've got total ants in your pants today, Yunho-yah. You're more misbehaved than the little kids on this carriage."

"Don't be jealous of my happy."

"Your 'happy?'" Junsu scoffed, reaching over to accept the cards I held out.

"Who wouldn't feel happy with their best friends sharing an otherwise boring train ride with them?"

"Butt kisser," Junsu replied.

"Call it what you want, loser," I sung out.

"Okay, okay, Yunho. Your energy is too draining. You're worse than me today, man! Make shadow puppets with yourself for a while, whilst I talk with my girl."

"Rude," I pouted, settling back into my chair.

The next time I looked over at them, I felt even more like a third wheel. The two of them had fallen asleep together. Eunbi was resting on Junsu's shoulder and in return, Junsu's head had fallen sideways until he was resting against the top of her head. Even in sleep they were inseparable. It was really cute. It made me feel a little lonely though. I was still in the mood to talk to people but Junsu and Eunbi were currently in their own little world and I had no right to disturb them.

I wished I had JaeJoongie here with me. I wouldn't have minded falling asleep on him right now like the lovebirds nearby me.

Slipping my thumb into my jean pocket, I tried to move the bulky mobile phone up my thigh through the material. Pulling it out, I thumbed through the photo gallery until JaeJoong's profile filled my screen. It was a little naughty of me, but I'd taken a new photo of him without his awareness. He'd been sitting in his bed drawing one night and I'd hovered next to the bed and called out to him. He'd looked right up at me near the camera lens with this silent, innocent query written all over his face. His eyes were all big and puppy dog-like, his fringe falling into them a bit. I'd been so lucky to catch such an adorable expression on my phone that night. It was a shame that I couldn't make it my wallpaper in case JaeJoong caught me out. I certainly didn't want another blow-up like last time that happened...

Gazing at the small photo wasn't as good as JaeJoong sitting beside me in the flesh, but it sure as hell was better than nothing.

I let my head fall towards my shoulder as I continued to stare into those big doe eyes, a small smile rising below my cheeks. The gentle train vibration rocked me to sleep like a baby and it seemed like nothing could prevent me from plunging down the slippery dip into my awaiting dreams, the wind brushing my hair backwards from the momentum.

I was in a dark room. Wherever it was, it looked quite old. A circular metal structure hung above my head in the rafters, its white paint flaking off in messy, ugly clumps.

It was an empty metal cage, the light bulb long gone, only leaving behind layers of rust. From the looks of things, it was once the only source of light in the room. Without it, the whole place should have been covered in darkness. Light was coming into the room somehow though. Strange.

As I glanced around, there were no lamps or even candles in sight. As far as I could tell, the light was coming from a couple of glowing objects. On the walls hung two large photo frames. Beneath the glass was a familiar photo of me in hospital. How many times now had I stumbled across the damn thing? And wherever it was, its friend was never far behind.

Sure enough, beside my framed photo hung a yellowing newspaper clipping of a young teenager who had committed suicide. Both frames seemed impossibly large in front of me. Uncomfortably so. They both hung there practically hand in hand, swelling with a sense of self-importance until their sizes grew into what they were today.

Out of all the photos that could have been blown up and framed, I couldn't figure out the logic of choosing me getting patched up in my hospital bed. It was hardly a happy snap worth remembering. To be honest, neither could I see the logic in keeping such a depressing newspaper clipping nearby it, which didn't have anything at all to do with me. As far as I could tell, the only thing they shared were depressing stories. Whoever decorated this room obviously didn't know the meaning of the word happy.

But the article apparently meant something to whoever had gone to so much trouble to hang it up. Perhaps it was someone's beloved daughter. Although, it was a little creepy that it hung next to my photo. Was I dead like her? Was this some kind of wacky afterlife matchmaking service? Coz I wasn't sure I approved.

Stepping closer to the photo frames, I tried to make out how they were able to glow so brightly and light up the whole room. The light didn't seem to be coming out from any particular place; it was just there on the photos. Light wasn't simply being reflected by the glass from somewhere behind me, it seemed to come from within the pictures themselves.

Turning back around, I watched the other side of the room slowly illuminate before my very eyes. Two new items had appeared, both on long pedestals, like artifacts sitting in a museum. Creeping over to the new display, I looked down. One of the items looked like some well-worn trinket, somewhat plastic-like as if it belonged to a kid’s toy. That held no interest to me. It was the item next to it that drew me down towards it.

The twinkling top of my grandmother's old ring greeted me, almost shining brighter as if recognizing its heir. An unpleasant yet urgent sense of déjà vu filled me. I had seen this combination of items many times, albeit without the creepy glowing, and minus that weird plastic toy piece. Why those three items in particular had any importance was beyond me. Apart from my grandmother's expensive ring, everything else was junk. Unimportant. Unneeded. Unnecessary.

A loud noise ran throughout the room and made me jump. I had no idea what it was, but it sounded like loud footsteps. My mother would kill me if I let my grandmother's ring sit here in the open, exposed to thieves. She'd probably smack me a good number of times if I left this room completely empty-handed when I'd had the opportunity to reclaim a family heirloom.

An involuntary shudder ran through my body and I quickly reached out to rescue the ring. The soft velvet box it sat in only had a few seconds to sink into my palm and reacquaint itself with its owner's grandson before it moved by itself and slipped through my fingers. It crashed loudly onto the floor and I jolted upright in my seat.

My phone was lying upside-down by my sneakers, its screen buried in the country train's worn carpet. In a daze, I bent to pick it back up. The fall had erased JaeJoong's photo from the screen (but thankfully not from the phone's memory), and now a set of random, ugly numbers replaced the spot his face had once been.

With a grimace, I wiped the screen against my thigh in a pitiful attempt to rub any germs off it. I then slipped it back in my pocket where it would be safer if I ever dozed off again that morning.

I couldn't believe that I was still having those strange dreams even though my best friends were sharing the ride with me across the aisle. The dreams couldn't give me one break from the weirdness to enjoy my friends' company? So rude and adamant to be heard, forcing their way into my head every train trip...

I scratched the side of my neck and tried to stretch my legs out as best I could. My shins still managed to bump into the seat in front of me. Oh well, I couldn’t have everything.

Sneaking a glance to my left, I saw Junsu sitting upright again and looking past Eunbi out the window. Leaning over my armrest, I started preparing my best baby voice and tapped Junsu’s arm. “Junsu-yahhh,” I whined. “I’m hungwwwy.”

He glanced back at me with a raised eyebrow. “Must you announce it in that voice?”

“Junsu-yahhh, feed meeee,” I continued on with wider eyes, ignoring his insult.

“Aish, shut up,” he snickered. “You are anything but cute, you know that?”

“Lies,” I grinned back. “I’m super cayooote.”

Junsu ignored my aegyo and turned back to Eunbi to get her lunch order and then followed me down the carriage to the food buffet.

“We’re gonna have a card rematch when we get into town, you realize? And this time you’re gonna lose and buy me dinner! The lunch I’m shouting you will be nothing compared to the amount you’ll have to cough up for my five-star dinner!” he declared with a sinister cackle, reaching into his pocket for his wallet.

“Cocky, cocky. Mr Presumptuous…” I rolled my eyes at him. “And I’ll have you know that my boyfriend’s meals are both five-star and affordable.”

A falling object caught my attention. When Junsu had pulled out his wallet, something small had fallen out as well onto the shaking ground between where the two carriages met. I bent to pick it up for him, but paused when I realized what it was.

I could feel a mischievous smile growing as I held the little packet up to the light that was shining in from the windows. I then called out to my friend before he could slip through the little door that opened up to the buffet carriage.

“Oi, Junsu. You dropped something.”

“Oh, what?” he responded, turning around instinctually.

“Your…cock sock,” I sniggered, holding it higher.

“Oh my god, shit!” he exclaimed, stepping over to hurriedly grab the condom from my fingers.

“Junsu, how lewd of you! On a public train… Think of the children!”

”Shut up!” he howled, his cheeks turning bright red. “It’s not like that.”

“Oh, it’s not?” I laughed back. “What is its purpose then? A lucky charm? Run out of rabbit’s feet, have ya?”

“Shush!” he hissed, looking past me through the door’s window that separated us from the other passengers.

“Chillax, man, they can’t hear us. We’re in train limbo land,” I began to laugh again.

“You never know…” he mumbled, hurriedly hiding the condom back in his pocket. “I forgot I had it here. It was supposed to remind me to buy more…”

“Buy more?” I echoed. My teasing mood slipped away as I processed the implications. “Wow… Um… Congratulations, I guess?”

“Thanks…” Junsu mumbled back, his words barely audible.

“Well, I’m starving. Let’s do this!” I quickly spoke up before either of us could feel anymore awkward. I walked past him to push the button that opened up the carriage door.

It wasn’t like neither of us hadn’t thought about the possibility of the other’s sexual activities—we were both healthy twenty-five year-old males, after all. But sex had never been a popular discussion between us and it was still a bit strange the rare times it actually came up in conversation.

It was a silly thought of mine, but at that moment I felt a bit pathetic to still be a virgin whilst even Junsu was getting through a whole condom box. I knew it was ridiculous to even see it as a race, but for some reason I felt really inadequate to still be stuck at the starting line while my best friend had moved forward and grown up. He obviously didn’t have any troubles getting it up in the times it counted.

As we waited in line, choosing what meal we craved for lunch, I tried to stop brooding over it all. I hated to admit it, but perhaps my surprise at the extent of Junsu’s sex life had to do with a bit of ego… I’d never really imagined myself far behind my best friend. We’d always been so similar in the past when it came to life’s stages. We had the same interests and goals. Heck, we went on most of our holidays together. And if you could survive going overseas into foreign cultures with no one to depend on but your friend, and not kill each other by the end of it, there was nothing that could stand in the way of your friendship.

But somewhere along the line, one had progressed further and experienced something great. It was an odd feeling. Not that we’d ever want to be together twenty-four/seven for all new experiences. What was I expecting to happen? Junsu letting me sit in a chair next to his bed, holding his hand as he made love with his girlfriend, just so that I could feel included? That was just gross! And creepy. Very creepy.

I was just being a baby. A baby with a stupid ego and unrealistic expectations. God, I hated myself right now…

When I got back to my seat, I unwrapped my chilli tuna and lettuce sandwich and shoved the whole half directly into my mouth as far as it could go, as if that would be enough to not only stop my words from coming out, but somehow also clog my stupid thoughts up.


“Have fun setting up, you two!” I smiled at Eunbi and Junsu as they trudged away from me with their luggage clanking behind them. Months ago it had been me pulling my luggage along toward the familiar motel with Junsu and my sister. I had a different place to go to now. I had someone to go to. “Oi you two, don’t get too caught up in town. Remember, we’ve got a dinner reservation at Café JaDe. I will personally smack your butts if you don’t show up after JaeJoong goes to all that effort!”

“We know, we know,” Junsu laughed, waving me away.

“Don’t let any sharks eat you when you go to the beach. They can swim really fast when they are going in for the kill—like eighteen kilometers per hour or something. To out that in perspective, you swim about eighteen meters per hour, Junsu-yah.”

“Oh, shut up!”

“Is he kidding about that?” I heard Eunbi ask Junsu as they walked away, her voice raised just a tiny bit. “About the sharks, I mean.”

“It’s Yunho, Eunbi. What do you think?”

“Aigoo, I heard that…” I mumbled to myself, reaching down to pick up my duffle bag. “And they can swim that fast. I got a good mark in science class for that presentation, thank you very much…”

Walking by myself to Café JaDe, I felt a smile rising. Tonight was going to be awesome! JaeJoong had reserved the four of us a table at the café. My three favorite people in the world—excluding my family, of course—sitting together, enjoying a nice break from work… I couldn’t imagine anything more awesome! And Eunbi was finally going to meet JaeJoong! She knew the basics about us and she had been so supportive of me. Perhaps JaeJoong could even make a new friend out of the experience.

As I climbed the stairs that led up to JaeJoong’s living quarters, I realized that the long train ride had failed to sap any of my energy. Instead of putting me in a sluggish mood, having done nothing but sit in a small seat for hours, it had inspired the opposite—boundless energy. I could have taken the stairs two a time despite carrying my duffel bag and hiking backpack. Finding JaeJoong sitting on his bed and bent over his sketchbook only increased my restlessness.

“Joongie-poos!” I called out with a grin, immediately dumping my gear by the bed. “Surprise!”

He looked up from his sketchbook with a smile. “Hardly. I could have heard you clomping up the stairs a mile away.” He glanced down at my sneakers. “Ah, they’re not even smoking. That is a surprise.”

I chuckled, glancing down at them as well. From all the energy zipping through my veins, I suddenly had the urge to run so fast they would start smoking and leave a stench of burning rubber throughout town.

“Feel like accompanying me for a walk?”

He smiled again, closing his sketchbook gently and putting it aside. “Okay.”

He was about to get up from the bed when he stared closer at my face and raised an eyebrow at my expression.

“Erm… Yeh, well, when I asked if you were up for a walk… I guess I really meant…”

“If I was up for a jog?” he finished for me.

I smiled sheepishly.

“That’s fine too,” he chuckled, reaching out for his sneakers. “It’s the least I can do knowing how you and trains get along.”

“I wuv you,” I grinned back, reaching out for him.

He sighed. “Come on, you ball of energy.” He accepted my hand and pulled me towards the fire escape exit so that we could keep holding hands longer without the annoying interference of public scrutiny.

Our jog was pleasant, even if I did have to restrain myself a couple a times from unleashing my full potential and bolting ahead of JaeJoong. We ran through the large parkland, dodging bicycles on the cycle track, the shrill bike bells going off to warn us that if we didn’t move we’d have tire marks over our backs.

By the time Changmin’s father’s ice cream cart came into view, I slowed down for JaeJoong to get a rest. Changmin was on duty, looking bored out of his skull. I guess it made sense that he wouldn’t get much business in the beginning months of winter. But as I drew nearer, I realized that he now sold hot beverages.

”Want one?” I asked JaeJoong, cocking my head towards where his friend stood.

“I didn’t bring my wallet…” he shrugged.

“Oh, neither did I. I didn’t think of that…”

JaeJoong laughed loudly, his hand flying up to cover his mouth before he could draw any unwanted attention our way from the otherwise quiet area.

“Yeh, yeh. You’re boyfriend’s an idiot. Very funny, indeed.”

His laughter grew quieter, but I could still see the amusement shining out from his eyes. It was then that I felt a warm zap sparking from my chest and heating up the rest of me. There wasn’t just amusement in his eyes when he gazed back at me. There was something else there. Something that made me feel kind of gooey inside.

Before I could do something I might have regretted—like, say, rushing over to give him a strong bear hug and then giving him a nice kiss to go with it—I put my hands in my pockets and stepped towards ChangMin. We might not have had money, but talking was sure free. I had a feeling JaeJoong might have wanted to chat with his friend whilst we were here. I suppose I could have ignored the tall man stuck behind his family’s cart, but I was in a great mood today. I didn’t want to let my selfishness and ego get in the way of my JaeJoongie’s happiness.

To my surprise, JaeJoong’s conversation with Changmin was quite brief. I had prepared myself for a long chat, but they merely said their hellos and exchanged their plans for the weekend before JaeJoong said goodbye to him.

“Did you two have a fight or something?” I asked him quietly as we walked away, back onto the cycle path.

”Huh? No. Why did you think that?”

“I dunno. I thought you two would talk longer.”

“He’s been busy with his studying so there isn’t much to say. And you’re only here for a few days so it would just be wasting time.”

That spark of warmth heated up my limbs again, and I could do nothing but stare at JaeJoong.

“What…?” he slowly questioned, eyeing me suspiciously.

“Nothing.” I beamed and then leapt forward to start jogging again.


When we had settled ourselves back at the café, I learnt with horror that in the evening, JaeJoong planned to cook dinner for us live. Like some sort of a servant! I managed to convince him not to, thankfully, after insisting rather vehemently that JaeJoong had to be with us the whole time and not hide away in the kitchens. JaeJoong’s excuse was that he didn’t want to give Junsu and Eunbi an awful meal that had lost its flavor after being heated up. I had a feeling though that JaeJoong’s shyness had been the main ringleader in that argument—and not his fussy cuisine ideals. A passionate: “The food is going to stay warm in the oven after you cook it for thirty minutes before they arrive, and that is going to taste just as good as a meal made live. End of discussion!” had put a quick stop to JaeJoong’s fretfulness. I even escorted JaeJoong down to the café kitchen to keep an eye on him and try to ease the rest of his nerves as he started preparing our meal.

As I watched the master do his work, I reached down a couple of times to pinch a few slices of the vegetables I’d cut up for JaeJoong. I thought I had gotten away with my nibbling, but apparently not.

“Yunho…”

“What?”

“Stop eating all of the ingredients.”

“Huh?” I tried to summon a look of innocence as I glanced beside me. I felt like I was a little boy again, being scolded by my mother for being naughty.

JaeJoong sighed, a small smile creeping up onto his face. “Are you hungry, Yunho?”

“Umm…” I let out a laugh. May as well admit my current shortcomings (ie. gluttony) before my stomach did it for me. “I guess I’m a bit peckish, yes.”

“Did you want me to make something for you? Something…sweet?”

A grin erupted over my face. “Yesss…”

“Something…snack-like?”

“Yessss.”

JaeJoong laughed loudly at my childish responses. “Okay fine, I’ll make them for you.”

”Yayyy, cookies!”

JaeJoong’s laughter increased and he began to tidy up the vegetable scraps, making room on the counter for the new ingredients. “Aren’t you rather silly today? I do believe you are more hyper than usual.”

”I’m just happy,” I grinned back, leaning closer to him. I had almost managed to nuzzle my cheek against the crook of his neck, but he pushed me away. We were still in the downstairs kitchen area, surrounded by JaeJoong’s employees.

“I’m sorry to be keeping you cooped up in here then,” I heard him mutter.

“Huh?”

He looked up at me innocently. It was such an annoyingly deceptive expression on his face, as if I had been the one mishearing things, thinking he had said something when he hadn’t.

“You said something. I heard you.”

“Oh.” He looked away, busying his hands with the cookie dough. “Yeh. I apologize.”

“For what?”

”Being boring.”

”Boring?” I echoed.

He nodded, jerking his head towards the messy counter in front of us.

“Ah. JaeJoong-ahhhh!” I scolded, probably sounding too much like a little kid again. “This isn’t boring. It’s fun. You know, I do all that exploring stuff every day I’m a work. Sometimes it is nice to have a change and slob around. Well, not that cooking isn’t hard work,” I chuckled. “It’s a different kind of work. And I like learning new things. Especially if you’re with me.” I bounced my hips to the side to bump against his.

He looked minutely happier. That boy really had low confidence levels. If I’d learnt anything in my past interaction with him, it was that I couldn’t hope to change them anytime soon. I could say stuff all I wanted, but he wouldn’t believe it right away. Belief came from within him at random moments. All I could do was keep trying to encourage him and hope that one day it would take him less time to believe me whenever I complimented him.


At dinner, I noticed that JaeJoong wasn’t quite himself. More shy than usual. Or maybe more wary than usual. He was perfectly polite to Eunbi and Junsu, but that was just it—he was polite, yet never really comfortable enough to join in our conversations. Even the way he sat in his chair was awkward—completely upright with his back eerily straight. I didn’t know how he could have sat so stiff for so long. I couldn’t understand what was worrying him though—he’d met Junsu before and Eunbi such a sweetheart. She had recognized JaeJoong’s shyness and never pushed him too far, yet still made sure to include him in the conversation as much as she could.

At one point I even had to slip my hand under the table and squeeze his thigh gently. The matching smile I wore on my face was often sent in his direction beside me. After a while, he settled down enough to finally respond to my smiles, but he still wasn’t quite himself. It began to worry me. As the hours had ticked on this afternoon, I had grown more and more excited at the thought of JaeJoong having dinner with my two close friends. I had imagined the four of us getting on really well and having so much fun. I couldn’t understand why that wasn’t the case in reality.

Later on, I pulled JaeJoong aside to figure out why. I found an empty space in the corner of the kitchen, mostly hidden away from view from the busy chefs.

“JaeJoongie… Are you okay?”

“Yes, of course.”

“Really? Because you could have fooled me,” I softly replied, my face creasing up with concern.

“It’s just…” JaeJoong began, just as softly. He let out a long sigh and then lifted his head to look at me. “Eunbi… Is she your…ex?”

I stared at him for a moment before the meaning of his words registered in my brain. Laughter erupted from my chest and I had to reach out to the wall to steady myself from tumbling sideways. “Good god, no!” I tried to stop laughing, but it seemed that there were still more chuckles left within me. “I told you, JaeJoong, that I don’t keep in contact with my ex. I can’t fake goodwill, JaeJoong, regardless of how saint-like you seem to think I am. Believe me, if that had been my ex sitting there, dating my best friend, you would have definitely known it!”

“Oh…” he let out quietly, reaching up to scratch his nose.

Ignoring the staff clattering away in the background, I pulled JaeJoong into a sideways hug and kissed his forehead affectionately. “Thank you for looking out for me… But it’s okay, you don’t need to be on guard anymore.”

He squirmed a little in my arms, but a small smile rose up.

”There’s that smile…” I teased softly, bending my head down to peer closer at his face. His smile grew at my words and I suddenly couldn’t look away. I couldn’t move. I could barely even breathe.

“Yunho…” he softly called, his warm breath blowing against my chin as moved my face closer. A hand touched my chest before I could kiss him. Its touch was gentle, but it was still pushing me away. I opened my eyes and tried to regain my control and sense of reality. “Not here, Yunho…”

I stepped back from him, concentrating on swallowing. My body was all warm and tingly from a strange and sudden arrival of energy. My limbs wanted to move forward again, pin him up against the wall and hold him there. My legs wanted to slip in between his and make room for me there. My teeth wanted to nip the skin of his shoulder and leave marks. It was a violent urge I had never felt before. The more I saw it in my mind, the more I had to restrain my muscles from moving. It was almost painful having to hold back from any movement, like trying to stretch a huge elastic band and fight the pull it had against you as it prepared to spring forward and fly with full force. My insides were a human slingshot. What was wrong with me tonight?

“Um, so… Should we get back?”

“Huh?” I looked back at him in a daze, my mouth hanging open slightly at the short puff of breath I had let out. “Yeah… Sure…”

I moved away from him and walked towards the kitchen door. Whatever had just happened to me and my body back there had shaken me up pretty good. I almost didn’t know what to do with myself as I returned to my seat and sank into it.

As Junsu and Eunbi struck up conversation again, I tried to let my muscles unclench. My finger absentmindedly slid across the slippery metal of one of my chopsticks. It was so smooth.

My eyes slipped closed and there that unnerving flash of energy was again. My hands grabbing JaeJoong from his chair and pulling him onto my lap. My fingers unbuttoning some of his shirt and untucking the ends from his pants. My mouth crushing against his as my thumb slid across his smooth chest. His hot breath coating my face all over as he let out continual pants and dug his hands into my hair.

My mouth was going dry and I quickly flung my eyes open to smash through the erotic image. I grabbed the glass of water in front of me and lifted it to my parched lips. Only a few drops soothed my tongue and throat before the heavenly liquid ran out. Almost knocking over the pepper grinder with my elbow as I grasped the water jug, I filled my glass up to the brim, trying to stop my hands from shaking.

The water began to overflow over the top of my glass and JaeJoong’s hands suddenly lifted the jug away from me. I was left holding onto air, the heavy weight gone from my hold.

“Thanks…” I murmured, avoiding his gaze as I lifted my glass up once more to drink my share and wash away the insanity.

“Uh-oh. Yunho’s gone senile,” I heard Junsu laugh.

I forced myself to laugh back dryly and scowl at him in mock anger like I normally would have done. Leaning back in my chair, I allowed my arms to lie slack in my lap and took some deep, silent breaths. I felt myself returning to normal. Only when my heart had stopped hammering and the heat had slowly evaporated from my skin could I let my normal idiotic smile come back.


///TBC///

A/N: I do apologise, as always, if parts of this chapter seemed a tad boring, but I guess you could say this chapters is one of those housekeeping ones, where things need to be explained for the plot’s sake. ^^;;

Oh boy, Yun’s starting to get a tiny bit horny. Or maybe sensual is the word. Nah, horny. XDDDD (Yes, there is gonna be some…physical progression…in the next chapter if all goes to plan. :P

Hope you guys liked the update. Thanks for your patience and awesome comments. You guys are just too precious. *squishes you all*

Until next time, my lovelies. *salutes*

Comments

[steorie.livejournal.com]

SPOTTTTT!!!! u saved mehhh, i was sooo deadly bored!!!!

♥

brb

[wild-terrain.livejournal.com]

LOL ORLY? ^____~

Hope this chapter doesn't bore you any further, hahah!! XD

*huggles* <3

[shigai.livejournal.com]

I normally don't do this, but I'm saving me a SPOT : DDD

Thanks for saving my bored life bb ♥

[wild-terrain.livejournal.com]

LMAO!!! That's the second person who has claimed they were bored. I'm not sure this is the right sort of chapter to ease that, but meh. XDD

<3

[doramaholic.livejournal.com]

hentai yunho alert. so his penis wants to be freed. XDD i cant forget the lazy penis from last chap. LMAO!
there better be more yunjae loving soon. ♥

[wild-terrain.livejournal.com]

LOL!!! The manga opened a gateway of perversion within him, eh! XDDD

Oh yes, can't forget his lazy penis. Soon we'll probably have to rename it the Unstoppable Penis. XDDDD *dumbass*

There is, there is. ^_~

<3

[steffiluvlife.livejournal.com]

haha horny yunnie! right about time dun cha think!
joongie's still being his wary and shy self, wished he opened up a little bit more!

[wild-terrain.livejournal.com]

HAHAH totttalllly. The manga opened a gateway of perversion within him, and I ain't complaining! XDDD

Yehh, a zebra can't change his stripes so easily, ne... You might see a pleasant progression next chapter with him though. ^_~

Thanks~ <3

[irerd-taga.livejournal.com]

Brb to comment after reading!!!!!

[irerd-taga.livejournal.com]

Yunho's so hyper in this chappie! I like it! Especially those naughty thoughts he had about Jae......yummy! Go Yunho!!!
Junsu the cutie has already batted while our manly Yunho-shii is stuck at first base! Lol~~

[trieze0713.livejournal.com]

Awwwww! I was expecting some 'actions' but I guess Yunho's feeling it finally :p
I can feel that I'll get what I want soon... ;)

[wild-terrain.livejournal.com]

Ahhh yush, not quite yet. But we're reaching the goodies now. This fic is really gonna fly (if all goes to plan, at least ^^;;;).

Nyahaha, yup that manga seems to have opened up a gateway of perversion within Yun, and I'm not complaining. >D

I'd definitely trust your feelings there, lol!

Thanks~ <3

[kiyazawa.livejournal.com]

i already am late!!!
spottooooooooooo!!!
XDDDDD

[kiyazawa.livejournal.com]

oohh!!!
Youuuuuuuu.... >_____<
i DEMAND yunjae "loving" in the next update!!!!!!
*give you yunjae cookies*
:DDDDD

YUnho!!! You got HORNY!!!!
LOOOOOOL
aawwhh,, he is just toooooo adorable... :p
when he thought that naughty things in the middle of their dinner,, i cant help but laugh my heart out,,, mwahahaha...
for God's sake yunho!! control yourself!!
XDDD

so,,,
the next chapter,,
will it be yunho bottomed or jaejoong???
(and why im talking about this, again??)
XDDD
i can't wait!!!!

[blackcherriess.livejournal.com]

spot!(: brb sooon

[blackcherriess.livejournal.com]

*speechless for a few mins* oh my!! yunho has like totally become a different person - he's like just so hyperactive (and he actually kekeke?! and whined). he seems very affected by the manga right right! lol @ his thoughts and his water-pouring - he can be just so adorable!(:

Gazing at the small photo wasn't as good as JaeJoong sitting beside me in the flesh, but it sure as hell was better than nothing. I let my head fall towards my shoulder as I continued to stare into those big doe eyes, a small smile rising below my cheeks.
I KNOW IT! xD hehe i know that he definitely will have a photo of jaejoong with him ((: and him falling asleep to jaejoong's photo is just awwwww - so sweeet! (i would totally agree that seeing jaejoong in flesh will be totally awesome..if only i can have such a chance too! *daydreams*).

the dream is kind-of freaky in a certain way (even though i've to say that the explorative nature of yunho is greatly shown here) *digs head to try to understand it* - there must be some kind of hidden message in it right? i can't believe that he has been having the same dream so often! can't wait to see how this dream gets played out in the story!(:

Junsu letting me sit in a chair next to his bed, holding his hand as he made love with his girlfriend, just so that I could feel included?
this is just love! xD i can't help bursting out to laugh even though i'm supposed to feel sad for yunho since he's feeling so frustrated. come on, yunho! jaejoong will love you the same with or without physical progression. hehee totally anticipating to see what type of physical progression - it's gonna be so interesting to see jaejoong's reaction post-sex (after all, yunho'll make him understand that he'll always be by jaejoong right??)

Months ago it had been me pulling my luggage along toward the familiar motel with Junsu and my sister. I had a different place to go to now. I had someone to go to.
♥ it's so lovely to return to a place knowing that someone you love is waiting for you, is anticipating to see you! this part is just so heartwarming(: it just emphasizes to me the love that yunho feels for jaejoong - something not fleeting but strong and permanent!

thankyou for this wonderful updatee!(: *big hug* and it's definitely NOT boring. it's nice to see all the different interactions (and of course, yunho acting like a child is a very refreshing scene)

[moon1084.livejournal.com]

So Fi, I sooooo know what you did there and I effing love it. LMAO!

"Don't be jealous of my boogie. I know that you are just jealous of my boogie.

Yunho are you a in the closest Drag Race fan that we didn’t know about? Brings back memories of our Drag-o-tor or whatever the hell the name of that thing was LMAO! We so totally yunhomo-fied yunho. Sooo can’t wait for that new show to start. We should totally inlist into it so they can help us out. If they can make those martial arts ladies look good, than we can too.

Okay let me get back to the commenting on this chapter.

Okay, so is it safe for me to assume that all those things are somehow going to link significantly to JaeJoong. Does that mean that ring is what JaeJoong is going to get when YunHo proposes to him. LMAO! Sorry, it just reminded me of that scene from epi 27 where, Tae Sub is like, I want this many karats ring or I won’t marry you and Kyung Su is all like araso. Poor guy. He didn’t know what he was getting. If that doesn’t confirm that Tae Sub is the uke, than I don’t know what would. Okay back to the fic.

It’s so funny that JaeJoong would think that YunHo would do something silly as to bring his ex to dinner. And JaeJoong himself is soooo damn cute and adorable. Trying to be all, “YunHo is that your ex dating Su because if she is, then I am here for you.” thing.

And then he accuses JaeJoong of being all distracted when towards the end of the chap, he is the most “distracted” Anyways, YunHo, I am sorry to break this to you, but what you are experiencing is a pre-boner (YES! I think I made that up and if I didn’t than I guess someone else and I had the same idea) aka wet live dreams aka horny as hell aka you want to take your joongie and stick it to him really good and nasty. LMAO! Ahem *cough* I think I am getting a bit carried away there. LMAO!

Can’t wait to see what happens next hun. YunHo, give in and act on these urges already. Do it for your Joongie.

[wild-terrain.livejournal.com]

Oh mah gawwd, gurrrl, you make me laugh like a whorrrre. XDDD

Glad you saw our little quote in there (albeit hidden behind the 'happy' XD)

LMAO!!! Boy did we Yunhomo-fy Yunho!! After all his 'Checkmate' performances, who thought it could be possible for him to look even gayer? But we sure proved them all wronggggg.

Bahah that reminds me, my friend lent me this romance series, right. And there is a drag queen mentioned already in the first chapter!! Daniel. Aka: Dana. LMAOOOO!! I was like holy crappp, I'm like a Drag Queen magnet! I attract them even in book format! XDDDD

hahah!! Yeh, and I totally didn't already explain how those items link in to the story to you. XDDD

Does that mean that ring is what JaeJoong is going to get when YunHo proposes to him.
You know it, gurrrrl!!!

Omgosh, yes Taesub was so hilarious in that ep!!! How he thought 1 carat was so stingy and unimpressive, so he knew from that day on that he wanted at least 2 carats when he got married!! HAHAHAH!! Chaeyeon's FACE when he said that was so fucking pricelesssssssss!!! Totally an expression of: omgg that is exactly the type of things I think about too.....dammmmmit, he really IS gayyyyy!! T_____T" I couldn't stop loling. Taesub was such an uke there. (And since we had that convo about how Jae is most like Kyungsoo, whilst Yun is more like Taesub.....I was like bahaha I can totally imagine Yun pouting over something musy like that even though technically JAE would be the fussy one when it comes to carats. Boy likes his jewelry expensive and shiny. XDDDD)

Isn't Jae's protective side just adorrrable (pardon my patronizing tone ^^;;). He was full on like "hmph, I'm not gonna be friends with you because you were mean to my Yunniepoos. If you make one wrong move, there is a giant frying pan in the kitchen with your face on it." XDDDD

LOL! I like this pre-boner concept of yours very much. Yun called his own manhood Lazy Peen...but soon I have the feeling it will be renamed The Unstoppable Peen. LMAOOOO!! Can't wait to just unhook Yun from his doggie leash and see him sprinting ahead to cock his leg up and hump Jae like no tomorrow. BAHAHAH!! (Well, what do ya know, looks like I got carried away there too. XDDD)

Lova ya so much. XD <3

[1stepcl0ser.livejournal.com]

Wooow, Yunho is finally willing XDDD Poor thing, though, that the still needs to hold back!

I had to laugh SO much because of this:

What was I expecting to happen? Junsu letting me sit in a chair next to his bed, holding his hand as he made love with his girlfriend, just so that I could feel included?

I really imagined that scene, lmao XDDD
And that cock sock thing was also too hilarious XD

I'm waiting for the next chapter <33

[wild-terrain.livejournal.com]

He totally is willing. That manga seems to have opened up a gateway of perversion within Yun, and I'm not complaining, nyahahah~ >D

LMAOOOO you imagined that scene eh? Good for you for attempting to sit through such a creepy image, hahaha!! XD

Thanks hun~ :D

[ch0cola.livejournal.com]

gaaaah so awesome!!
Haha yunnie is really horny! omg haha

and I hope you won't let us wait for too long! I mean... if it wasn't for 'skinship' next time... xD
So you can't take too long now that you let us taste blood... lol it would be too cruel, you know that right!!

<333 aaah I love you xD

[wild-terrain.livejournal.com]

hehehe totally horny!! That manga seems to have opened up a gateway of perversion within Yun, and I'm not complaining, nyahahah~ >D *gets smacked*

I do know that, I do... I have lots of shizz planned out for next chapter. Gonna be a whopper length (and I'm not just talking about Yun's erection!! XDDD)

I'll try and blackmail my muse into behaving for you. :P

Thanks bb!! ILU too! Hope things are going alright for you over there. ^^
<3

[meheartyunho.livejournal.com]

YAH! WHERE'S THE PROMISED SEX?! XD

hahahha I LOVE how horny Yunho is becoming XD Go get him! rawwwwr.
I am mad at you now XD Give me my sex damn it!! Other than that Yunho is so adorableeee!

I like how they just understand each other and how Yunho is constantly trying to help JJ understand how wonderful he is ^-^ OK i can't say so much right now, I'm way too distracted x_x Just know that I'm lurking and I'm waiting... Oh yes I'm waiting >)

Awesome as always :D <33

[wild-terrain.livejournal.com]

It got delayed, dear wifey, to next chapter. You should have known there would be no smex this chapter since I hadn't left you a spot of victory! XDDD

LMAOOO!! Totally, right? That manga seems to have opened up a gateway of perversion within Yun, and I'm not complaining, nyahahah~ >D

Oh pfffft, you're the only person who has even read the skeleton of the smut part! What more do you want from meeeee! XDDD

You're lurking and waiting LMAO!!! You're ready to snatch the front row seat, aren't ya? You pervy little Swedish gal!! XD

Whilst you wait for the Yunjae sex-o-rama, why don't you come back into bed and we can have one of our own... *wiggles eyebrows* lolllllll. I was referring to a QAF marathon. What were you thinking of?? :P

<3

[linhchipham.livejournal.com]

Spot ! Will come back for proper comment ^^

[linhchipham.livejournal.com]

I can't say anything other than your update is awesome.

Jae is totally cute .The way he clueless about Yun's invitation ( the last chapie is Yun then this chapie is Jae's turn ) ,the way he think Eunbi is Yun's ex.LOL .And horny Yun í cute too.

But Yun's dream is scary.I have bad feeling.

[yunho1205.livejournal.com]

Hahahahaha!! Yunho is horny!! That's too funny!!

I'm wondering what Yunho's dream meant. Hmmmm.

I can't wait for Jae's pov, I wonder if he still feels that having sex with Yunho will make Yunho leave? LOL!! Silly Joongie!!

[youinmyjumpsuit.livejournal.com]

looks like the tables have turned. XD
can yunho control himself? haha

[blu-eyezz.livejournal.com]

Oooo~!Yunho has good self control. For a while there, I thought he poured the jug of water on himself!lol xD Well who can resist jaejoong eh?! :)

Im a bit worried about the wierd dreams Yunho is having..So I am guessing he's had the same dream more than once?!I hope both of them make it through..

Looking fwd to seeing more Yunjae and more interaction with EunBi & Junsu :)
Thanks for the lovely update hun *hugs* :D

[yunjae2009.livejournal.com]

Yunnie is horny!! can't wait for the next chapter......wonder what the dream meant... is yunnie somehow related./involved in what is going on with Jae?

[swallowtt.livejournal.com]

oh, my...yunho is so hyper. XD i guess the yaoi mangas really got his lil yunnie up and working properly. hehe~ looking forward to more. hwaiting~

[zoevo.livejournal.com]

haha, horny Yunho is really horny!
I completely understand you, Yunho! Cause that's what you got once you read yaoi (from self-experience).
and Finally the smut is coming!
Please grant my perverted fangirl wish!
Thanks for this lovely update, <3.

[blackie-cin.livejournal.com]

Yunho is sooo much love here...like, really really....god, I would never want to be on a train ride with him, but I cracked up at his hiperactiveness (or something like that)...he's too adorable for his own good....and the way he reassures Jae...it's like he's tuned to Jae's moods...

the dream was awesome...I loved the mistery and the mild horror feel I got...and it got me thinking the whole day what it meant (in the end I found the answer between the comments, and it was the same thing I thought ^_^)....

Yunho is not getting a tiny bit horny..he's getting as horny as an over 20 guy, who wasn't really horny before can get....once you unleash him, Jae's not getting out of that bedroom till Yunho's there....poor Jae XD....

I would however like to request a dose of brain bleach or something akin...I imagined the scene with Yunho, Junsu and Eunbi....it was creepy aspecially since my brain took to make Yunho encourage them, like "Junsu, you can do it" and... Brain Bleach, Now!

anyway, I hope you can update soon!!
love and kisses

ps. will there be a Jaejoong POV soon? I've been dying for one since the last one....pwease...*puppy eyes*

[rurutia88.livejournal.com]

OMG OMG OMG!!!
YESSSSSSSS to the physical progression!!!
u don't know how much i've been waiting for it to happen...and i hope the next chapter will have more of 'it'...ehehehe...
yunho...u've become a very sexual person...and thanks to joongie for that!

[xox-roxygurl.livejournal.com]

U U GIVE ME MORE U TEASEEEEEEEEEEEE xDD

[bladilip.livejournal.com]

*Yun definitely got his horny on!
That manga seems to have
opened up a gateway of
perversion within Yun, and I'm
not complaining. >D* << LOLing at this ahahahaha!

So true..yunho's finally feeling IT!! Wahaha!! He must thank his sister for keeping such thing ahahaha! And hands-down to yunho for controlling his urges ahaha! Man! That's hard! Ahahaha!

And deym..those dreams...it really has some mysterious meaning behind it all..

Yeah..i admit i'm expecting some ACTION in this chappie but hey! i don't mind at all..i think it became much more interesting..being NICE AND SLOW wahahahaha!


ooh~ getting excited for the next chap n_n

*btw, want to apoligize for not commenting on the last chapter...my laziness attacks again ahahaha!

[museelo.livejournal.com]

Yunho is horny ? o.o I thought he had sort of magic spell on him o___o"

I'm sorry I've missed some chapters ;__;
But as always, it's great :'3

I feel like repeating myself but I love the way your write, the way you made your characters evolving... It's pretty amazing ^^

Thank you for these chapters, see you :D

[wasabisaru.livejournal.com]

uahh uahhh
im totally in love with ur FF
...great style... great story.... i love how u develope those subtle feelings between the two of them.

greets from germany!
im recommendin ur LJ to my friends!
tripple hug !!!
mika