Why Jaejoong must have seen exactly every expressions in Yunho while his mind was not clear enough to understand it. I especially hate it when people feel hurt only because misunderstanding, it just make every pains much worse than ever.
Both of them all considered their situation in the wrong way. First Jaejoong then Yunho. But I totally can sympathise with Jae, if I had been in his shoes, witnessing Yunho unconsciously withdraw his hand as soon as he touch my skin, I would have also thought that he was disgusted by me. How desperated Jae felt when he thought his belief was betrayed cruelly like that. "Why had he abandoned me too? I could handle God abandoning me because I had lost faith in such a deity a long time ago. But Yunnie… I had believed in him. He had made me believe in him only to discard me.", such a beautiful saying <33333
For Yunho, I think that he must have known what had happened at that night, for the following morning, he said sorry...maybe sorry for his unexpected withdraw. But YH's reaction is definitely understandable because after months, it's the first time Jae suddenly didn't scared of the sensuous touch anymore and be that daring. Yunho must have had such a serious shock or he may have thought that it was a dream only. JJ just sinked in his own anguish too deep and too soon to be able to understand YH's confusedness.
However, I am really not sure why YH agrred to discharge Jaejoong. He wanted Jae to have a more peaceful life or...everything happening all of a sudden at the time caused such a traumatizing situation that was totally too much for him to handle. YH may have been scared of seeing JJ hurt, scared of himself not strong enough to protect JJ or perharps, he was even scared that some day he would have see JJ die in front of his own eyes. So somehow, he wanted to escape for a moment. Moreover, YH definitely knew that JJ did not need anything else or anyone else beside YH's love and YH. So I don't think discharging Jaejoong was really for JJ's own benefit at all. "Be brave. You’ll get better.", ít is easy to say in a goodbye letter but if JJ could be get better that easily, there was no thing to say from the start. "Until we meet again there will not be one second when I am not thinking about you and wishing for your happiness to return.", I don't think Jae could endure to wait until the time YH became calm again.
But whatever, I still dont want to see they separated once more. The last time had already hurt too much. Moreover, Jae could cut himself once, no one could assure that he would never do this again, especially when YH left him. I hope them to stay together, may be hurt or even torment each other but please let them overcome this hardship together till the end. I don't want to see Jae finally gave up since he thought that he didn't deserve, he could begin a new life or anything else. Without the other, they would become insane soon.
This chapter does not include many actions but feeling only, so much extreme feelings...hichichichic :((:((:((
Next weekkk~ How can I wait till next week??? T__T
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timeasmymeasure
no subject
Date: 2008-05-02 03:18 pm (UTC)Yehh, as you've said it. It's awfully hurt TT__TT
Why Jaejoong must have seen exactly every expressions in Yunho while his mind was not clear enough to understand it. I especially hate it when people feel hurt only because misunderstanding, it just make every pains much worse than ever.
Both of them all considered their situation in the wrong way. First Jaejoong then Yunho. But I totally can sympathise with Jae, if I had been in his shoes, witnessing Yunho unconsciously withdraw his hand as soon as he touch my skin, I would have also thought that he was disgusted by me. How desperated Jae felt when he thought his belief was betrayed cruelly like that. "Why had he abandoned me too? I could handle God abandoning me because I had lost faith in such a deity a long time ago. But Yunnie… I had believed in him. He had made me believe in him only to discard me.", such a beautiful saying <33333
For Yunho, I think that he must have known what had happened at that night, for the following morning, he said sorry...maybe sorry for his unexpected withdraw. But YH's reaction is definitely understandable because after months, it's the first time Jae suddenly didn't scared of the sensuous touch anymore and be that daring. Yunho must have had such a serious shock or he may have thought that it was a dream only. JJ just sinked in his own anguish too deep and too soon to be able to understand YH's confusedness.
However, I am really not sure why YH agrred to discharge Jaejoong. He wanted Jae to have a more peaceful life or...everything happening all of a sudden at the time caused such a traumatizing situation that was totally too much for him to handle. YH may have been scared of seeing JJ hurt, scared of himself not strong enough to protect JJ or perharps, he was even scared that some day he would have see JJ die in front of his own eyes. So somehow, he wanted to escape for a moment.
Moreover, YH definitely knew that JJ did not need anything else or anyone else beside YH's love and YH. So I don't think discharging Jaejoong was really for JJ's own benefit at all.
"Be brave. You’ll get better.", ít is easy to say in a goodbye letter but if JJ could be get better that easily, there was no thing to say from the start. "Until we meet again there will not be one second when I am not thinking about you and wishing for your happiness to return.", I don't think Jae could endure to wait until the time YH became calm again.
But whatever, I still dont want to see they separated once more. The last time had already hurt too much. Moreover, Jae could cut himself once, no one could assure that he would never do this again, especially when YH left him. I hope them to stay together, may be hurt or even torment each other but please let them overcome this hardship together till the end. I don't want to see Jae finally gave up since he thought that he didn't deserve, he could begin a new life or anything else. Without the other, they would become insane soon.
This chapter does not include many actions but feeling only, so much extreme feelings...hichichichic :((:((:((
Next weekkk~ How can I wait till next week??? T__T